Kobe Bryant has decided not to opt-out of his contract with the Lakers and will pick up his 23 million dollar option for the 2009-2010 NBA season. I can't think of joke here so I will just say something very serious...I wish I was Kobe Bryant.
And now that Michael Jackson is out of the way, I am on the way to doing it, folks. I am going to use the latest in scientific technology to reverse his skin grafts, thus becoming the first white comedian to become a black basketball player. Then, years later, after my premature, prescription-drug-induced death, my father can announce that he is doing a new concert with my songs, even before I am buried.
(Yes, that didn't technically make sense, because as a basketball player wouldn't be singing. But, you know, if Shaq can rap, I can sing the blues.)
More tomorrow...
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