Ask and Tell and Sing and Dance

I was out at Ben's Podpourii event last night, so I didn't get to catch The State of the Union. As I'm checking the morning new online though, I'm seeing that Obama asked for a repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." While I still don't plan on joining the military, it's a step, and we'll take it...

I'll catch up on some of the other highlights and post more a little later. Apparently, Harry "Mr. Excitement" Reid was yawning throughout the speech. Wow, Obama, with friends like these...

Six Pack #30

Latest Episode. Click it. You Know You Want To.

Dave's Think Alike

The best part of this NBC Leno lunacy is that it seems to have given Letterman his edge back...

Six Pack # 29

Latest Episode. Click it. You Know You Want To.

Comedy at Many, Many Levels

I'm loving this Letterman clip for several reasons. I think you'll be able to figure out just about all of them...

Transforming From Movie to Video-Game

Just came across this trailer for a new Transformers video-game that looks a lot more like the original from the 80's than the movies where Shia Lebouf and Meghan Fox run around screaming...

Video Games | Transformers: War for Cybertron | One Shall Stand Trailer HD

XBox 360 | Playstation 3 | Nintendo Wii

Now I gotta get someone with a PS3 to buy it and invite me over...

Betty is Back, Baby!

Between Rue's stroke (she's doing ok), Leno sucking (old news) and the earthquake in Haiti (obviously no joke there), it has been a really nutty week. So, in an effort to end it on a high-note, I wanted to mention that I just heard of a new TV Land pilot starring Hollywood's official grandma, Betty White.

We'll see if it gets picked up, or is just a Golden Girls knockoff, but either way, anything with Betty deserves a mention.

Oh, and also if you haven't been following the Six Pack on Twitter, get your butt over there and do it. I've been going Twitter crazy lately, and trust me, you don't wanna miss it. Click here and have a good weekend...

You Can't Spell Jerk without the "Jay"

Jay continues to become even more of a patsy, this time even on his own "show." Mad props to Jimmy Kimmel for this one...

Allow Me to Quote...Myself?

I've never done this is 1,196 posts here on Rubinville, but I with all this late night TV madness, and suddenly everyone jumping on the anti-Jay Leno bandwagon, I have to quote myself and link you guys to an interview I did for The Gothamist back in 2005. Just click here.

For those of you with ADD (I assume most of you), who don't have the patience to read the whole article, allow me to clip out the key part...

What famous comedian is least deserving of his success?

The easy answer would be Carrot Top. Everyone will say Carrot Top. You ask nine out of ten comedians, "Who's the biggest hack in the world?," they'll say Carrot Top. I don't think that's the true answer. In some respects, Leno is the answer. Leno took a great television institution that was hosted by legends -- Jack Parr and Steve Allen and Carson --and Leno made it an embarrassment. All it is is part of the Hollywood machine. Leno has twenty writers to be that funny? I've got one writer to be this funny. Comedy has something to do with integrity. A real standup comic has integrity, and Leno has none. Bill Hicks did a great bit 15 years ago about Leno and how he's just owned by NBC: One day he'll be interviewing Joey from Blossom -- this a while back -- and Joey's going to say something and Leno's going to take out a gun and shoot himself in the head, and when his brains explode, it's going to form the NBC peacock because he's a company man to the end. Leno is everything that's wrong with entertainment. And I know Leno can crush me if he reads this, but you've got to have some sort of integrity. Being a comedian is not about promoting bullshit. But the Tonight Show has now become just a platform to promote movies. There's no truth to it. And that's fine if that's what the show is, but it wasn't always that. Carson nurtured great young comics. Leno's nurtured nobody. They're too insecure now to bring on anyone talented. And this is probably ensuring that I'll never be on Leno.

Not bad considering I said that 5 years ago and finally everyone is on board now. Oh, and for the record, I met Conan on the street about a year ago on the Upper West Side and even though it was raining he stopped, we chatted and he even gave me the show bookers name.

So yes, Conan, Ben and I will gladly follow you to Fox...

A Rue'd Awakening

Rue McClanahan has suffered a stroke earlier today while recovering from bypass surgery. My sources says she is okay for now but it's gonna take a lot of rehabilitation. If anyone has the physical stamina to do it though, it surely is her. I mean just watch her dance in this telethon...

C'mon Rue, Big Daddy can't wait a little longer to see you...

Mein (Latenight) Kampf

While this doesn't move Hitler up in my book, his rant here basically sums it all up...

Liar, Liar, (Extremely Large) Pants on Fire

Mark McGwire, pictured here testifying before Congress, has finally admitted to using steroids. Of course, everyone knew this all along, and he still claims he hit all those home-runs even without the juice. Jose Canseco is still saying that he and Mark injected each other back in the early 90's*, but Mark is denying that. Seeing as everything else Canseco has said regarding this eventually comes true, I'm gonna go with him on this one.

In a related story, I continue to take my Centrum Performance hoping that it will make me funnier, but as of yet there is no proof.

*Injected each other with steroids, that is. Get your mind out of the gutter.

Six Pack...Literally

Six Pack 28 just went live and you can click here to listen. We interview Broadway star Nick Adams in it, who tells us amongst other things what it was like working with Saved by the Bell's very own Mario Lopez, as well as how he maintains his ridiculous abs. (That's Mario to the left in the pic, and Nick to the right, by the way.)

We also do our usual hilarious stuff, plus you can even hear me losing my shit as I try to explain a story about a woman from Ohio who punched a McDonald's employee because there were no more Chicken McNuggets.

Oh, and are you following us on Twitter yet? It's all about Twitter, people. Now don't be afraid, just close your eyes and click.

Conan Minus Leno = Leno Minus Conan (Kinda)

TMZ is reporting that NBC is cancelling Jay Leno's 10 pm disaster and giving him back his old job as the host of The Tonight Show. That probably leaves Conan O'Brien looking for work, though maybe they'll kick him back to 12:30 and give Jimmy Fallon the boot. Frankly, it all doesn't really matter as nobody watches these shows anyway, but I would like to say that I predicted this even before the Leno's 10 show debuted. Need proof? Click here.

I do need someone to explain to me how if you get awful ratings that hurt the local news after your show that you then get rewarded with the same job back that you were forced out of in the first place.

You're right, you're right, calm down, Dave. If there was ever a sign of my preeminent success, this is it...

(I don't think I used the word "preeminent" correctly there. What word was I looking for?)

I Like Jack

CNN's Jack Cafferty summed up what pretty much everyone is saying about health care, politics and the non-stop lies related to health-care on "The Situation Room" last night...

Sometimes you need and old, grumpy guy to tell ya how it is, right?

One Big Fish

Check out this big-ass tuna, which was just sold for $177,000 bucks at a Japanese fish auction. Two sushi restaurant owners split the cost, and I assume will split the fish, though how they will decide who gets heads and who gets tails I have no idea.

Seeing is my mom is concerned that I eat too much tuna and am probably suffering from mercury poisoning I won't be having a spicy-tuna roll from this fish's gut. But if any of you want to fly me out to Japan to get a taste I'd be willing to take the risk.

Now excuse me, I have a couple old-school thermometers to suck on...

Six Pack 27

Click it. You Know You Want To.

Blue is the New White

Our fantastic graphics guy Andy Diehl created this picture of Ben and I as Na'avi from Avatar. If you haven't seen the movie yet, get your ass over there before you finish reading this sentence.

Oh, sorry, that was a little tricky of me.

Point is, go see it. Even both my parents liked it, which only happens once every twenty years.

Alright, I gotta go sticky my tail into the tail of another organic life form.

See, if you had seen it already that would've made sense to you...