Friday, September 17, 2010

The Left Hand of Darkness

A new study in one of my favorite reads, The Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, says that left-handed people are more prone to anger. I can't begin to tell you how angry that makes me. And you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

As if that's not enough, the elliptical machine is telling me to run faster. It makes me so angry when machines tell ms what to do.

Speaking of machines, doesn't it get you really angry when machines try to take over the universe like in The Matrix?

Ugh, and The Matrix, I mean what the hell were those two sequels about? Nothing angers me more than poorly thought out, unnecessary sequels.

Damn you powerful right brain for making me so angry. I'll get you and your little dog, too!

(Whoa, I guess they're right, lefties are more creative. Or slightly insane.)


Barry said...

Yes, but do your clothes rip off of you when you get angry? Except for your pants, of course. I never really understood why the pants don't rip completely off. Is it modesty? Or is it the fact that everything doesn't automatically become larger when the rest of the body does? Time to ponder some more.

Carter Ng said...

Do you think left-handed and homosexual are correlated? Hmm, interesting.

DocP said...

True Story: 10 minutes after I came out to my father he called my sister to discuss his fears. He said that he was worried that I would face so much prejudice because I was Jewish, Left-Handed and now gay....

My sister broke into laughter and reassured him that I probably wouldn't be drowned like a witch due to my left handedness and went on to remind him that we lived in Los Angeles and were in the entertainment industry so being gay and Jewish were not exactly a minority.

My father thought for a minute, agreed with my sister and never had a problem with my sexuality afterward.

Shannon E. Ennis said...

Lefties are also prone to more awesomeness. I don't know what the DSM code for that is, but it's totally diagnosed.

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