rubinville

Went to Duane Reade this morning (Eckerd's for my Southern readers), only to end up waiting on line for about 15 minutes because the woman in front of me was trying to return Krazy Glue. Yea, you read that right, she was trying to return Krazy Glue. Not only was she trying to do that, which is ridiculous enough, but she also didn't have the receipt for the Krazy Glue, which led to all kinds of people having to be called over the PA system and nearly caused a riot of angry customers.

Fortunately, she had the receipt for her Danish magazine with the Mohammed cartoon in it, so that stopped the rest of us from burning the store to the ground.

Yea, I'm still fanning the flames.

Anyway, why in the world would someone return Krazy Glue? Is it at all possible to buy it and then find out that it doesn't work? Has Krazy Glue every not worked? Could you buy Krazy Glue and then realize you've purchased the wrong thing? For the three bucks it costs could you just not return it? And then, to top it off, you try to return it without the receipt? This woman clearly needed her brain krazy glued into her head.

While on line during this fiasco, I was in front of an older woman who had two packages of adult diapers. I couldn't help but think that she was about to have an accident and that I was gonna be standing in it if the Krazy Glue woman didn't move quick enough. Fortunately, she either held it in, or she was wearing her very last diaper.

Steering away from adult incontinence, my hoops team beat a bunch of bankers 79-75, last night. I scored only 8 points but hit two big free throws with about a minute to go. I'll spare you the rest of the details, but let me just say that bankers are the biggest bunch of whiny, arrogant, blowhards that you can ever play a sport with.

Should I have hyphenated the word blowhards? I'm not sure, but let's just go ahead and replace it with ass-monkeys.

Good work. You get a check-plus. A hyphenated check-plus.