Close Encounters of the Political Kind

New reports say that the democrats are consulting Steven Spielberg to help them rebrand themselves. So far the only thing he has offered up is to make Nancy Pelosi look more alien-like, though her plastic surgeon says that is scientifically impossible.

Here are several other jokes that would've worked there:

• He has recommended that like ET, Harry Reid hide in a child's closet until it is safe to come out. (Better right before the election.)
  
• He told house democrats to shape their mashed potatoes into Tea Party Republicans and then smash them.
• Mentioned that they might want to stop referring to President Obama as "the Minority Report" president.
• He reversed roles with them and asked for help rewriting the end to "AI."
• He told them to get the names of the people on Schindler's List and ask for campaign donations.

Got any more for me? Did I skip something glaringly obvious?

Bill Back, Barack Bounced

Bill Clinton may have just begun his third-term in office. Don't think it's possible? Let's go to the videotape...

Not only does Bill say, "Please go" as he waves his hand at the President, but check out how comfortably and seamlessly he takes the next question and leans on the podium as if to say, "Yea, you all know I still got it."

No word whether he'll be shacking up with Michelle tonight...

Honesty is the Best Rarely Used Policy

I've been wanting to get to this one all week, but between the Six Pack, bumping into Jerry Seinfeld and Joy Behar's birthday, I just simply didn't have enough time.

(Cough, cough.)

The video below of Anderson Cooper taking profoundly dishonest Florida politician Alan Grayson to task over an attack ad his campaign put out. It's absolutely emblematic of why people are sick of politics and distrust pretty much everyone on both sides of the aisle.

Anderson does a great job here, "Keeping Them Honest." Grayson does a great job of being a smug douchebag. Here ya go...