rubinville

For the first time in the history of whatever it is I do here, I've written a guest column on someone else's blog. Check it out at www.andrewtavani.blogspot.com.

I assume I'll be asked to write for various other high-profile websites now, so hopefully that won't affect my Daily Dave duties.

Here's my letter to Ellen for today...

Ellen,
I scored 22 points last night and my team is now 4-0 in our basketball league. That's not a question, just thought you'd like to know.

Dave

Mother's Day on Sunday. I was going to get my mom a pass to a day spa, but then yesterday I got a call and apparently she's been kidnapped by a group of international ninja's so I'll have to spend the weekend trying to save her. The same thing happened three years ago, so it's not a big deal really. However, I am looking for a sidekick for the adventure, so if you're interested just e-mail me.

New York City is expected to have a 3.2 billion dollar surplus this year. Clearly, NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg shouldn't be a politician. He's fixed the budget, crime is down, the city is cleaner, and quality of life is rising. As a comic this really pisses me off. There's nothing funny when things are going well. Damn you Bloomberg!

Starbucks just pulled the latest Bruce Springsteen CD out of it's stores because the lyrics are "too racy." Instead they are going with a Marilyn Manson compilation.